WHO WILL WIN?
Armadillo
GRUNT-SCRITCH
Sea Lion
ARK-ARK-ARK
THE SETUP

Armadillo vs Sea Lion

Armadillo
Armadillo
Sea Lion
Sea Lion

Pretend a armadillo and a sea lion meet in the desert. Look at the facts. Then you pick.

Would they meet?

No. Wild armadillos and sea lions would not meet. We still look at the facts.

This is pretend and based on facts. Real animals usually hide or leave.

Read the facts. Make your card. The page waits to pick.

Corner A

Armadillo

Dasypus novemcinctus · A walking helmet that sometimes becomes a soccer ball.

Armadillo
Home
Americas grassland and scrub · Lives in North America / South America
Food
Plants and meat
Group
Lives alone
Size
Armadillo is small.

Bug vacuum.

Nose-first.

Startle, ball up or bolt.

  • Armadillo is small and fast.
  • Insects, grubs, and the occasional small snack.
  • Warm country with soil soft enough to mine.

Family: Sloths and anteaters.

Corner B

Sea Lion

Zalophus californianus · A barking torpedo in a wet tuxedo.

Sea Lion
Home
Pacific coasts · Lives in North America
Food
Meat
Group
Lives in a big group
Size
Sea Lion is big.

Fish chaser in the surf.

Whiskers read fish in murk.

Playful and noisy.

  • Sea Lion is big and not very fast.
  • Fish, squid, and the occasional unfortunate leftover from the ocean buffet.
  • Rocky coasts and piers, where barking is a civic duty.

Family: Fur seals and walruses.

TO SCALE!

SIZE & WEIGHT

Stand them next to a grown-up. Who is bigger and heavier?

1.70 m

Grown-up

0.30 m

Armadillo to scale

Armadillo

1.20 m

Sea Lion to scale

Sea Lion

Height to scale. A grown-up is 1.7 m.

Armadillo6 kg

About as heavy as a small melon wearing a knight costume.

Sea Lion300 kg

As heavy as a couple of grown-ups, shaped like a barking sofa.

Armadillo

0.30 m · 6 kg

Armadillo is small. 6 kg.

Sea Lion

1.20 m · 300 kg

Sea Lion is big. 300 kg.

Kilograms are honest. A small animal can still have a strong tool.

Who would you pick for size?

TOOLKIT!

TOOLS

Teeth, claws, horns, venom, kick — what tools do they have?

  • Weapon: Digging claws
  • Armor: Bony banded shell
  • Senses: Nose-first.

Armadillo · labeled field diagram

  • Weapon: Speed-bite plus flipper slap
  • Armor: Blubber wetsuit
  • Senses: Whiskers read fish in murk.

Sea Lion · labeled field diagram

Armadillo80 psi bite
Sea Lion400 psi bite

Armadillo

Digging claws

Tool: digging claws. Bite: 80 psi.

Sea Lion

Speed-bite plus flipper slap

Tool: speed-bite plus flipper slap. Bite: 400 psi.

A bite number is only one tool. Coils and kicks count too.

Whose tools would you trust?

ZOOM!

SPEED

Who gets there first?

Armadillo
48 km/h
Sea Lion
30 km/h
Armadillo48 km/h
Sea Lion30 km/h

Armadillo

48 km/h

Armadillo can go 48 km/h. That is fast.

Sea Lion

30 km/h

Sea Lion can go 30 km/h. That is not very fast.

A fast animal can miss. A slow one only has to connect.

Who takes the speed card?

HOME MAP!

HOME

They meet in the desert. Who is built for this place?

N. AmericaS. AmericaEuropeAfricaAsiaAustraliaAntarctica
ArmadilloSea LionBoth

Meeting biome: the desert. Colored land is where each animal actually lives.

Armadillo

This is home · Lives in North America / South America

Armadillo lives in places like the desert.

Sea Lion

Wrong place · Lives in North America

Sea Lion's home is the pacific coasts, not the desert.

No. Wild armadillos and sea lions would not meet. We still look at the facts.

Who gets the home point?

MENU!

FOOD

How do they get lunch?

Armadillo
Plants and meat · Bug vacuum.
Sea Lion
Meat · Fish chaser in the surf.

Armadillo

Plants and meat · Bug vacuum.

Insects, grubs, and the occasional small snack.

Sea Lion

Meat · Fish chaser in the surf.

Fish, squid, and the occasional unfortunate leftover from the ocean buffet.

A plant eater is not 'safe.' Hippos and elephants still end arguments.

Whose hunting or defending helps more?

MOOD!

MOOD

Alone vs team. This rumble is one vs one.

Armadillo
Lives alone
Sea Lion
Lives in a big group
Armadillo5 grit /10
Sea Lion6 grit /10

Armadillo

Lives alone

Startle, ball up or bolt. Grit: 5/10.

Sea Lion

Lives in a big group

Playful and noisy. Grit: 6/10.

Pack and pride animals lose their backup in a 1-v-1.

Who is better for a solo meeting?

PING!

BRAINS

Who notices first and thinks next?

Armadillo
4/10
Sea Lion
6/10
Armadillo4 brains /10
Sea Lion6 brains /10

Armadillo

4/10

Nose-first.

Sea Lion

6/10

Whiskers read fish in murk.

In the wild, brains often mean leave before it starts.

Who would you score for noticing?

COUSINS!

FAMILY

Who are they related to?

Armadillo
Dasypus novemcinctus
Sea Lion
Zalophus californianus

Armadillo

Dasypus novemcinctus

Sloths and anteaters.

Sea Lion

Zalophus californianus

Fur seals and walruses.

Cousins are clues, not a score.

Not a fight point. Who has the wilder family story?

WILD CARD!

SPECIAL

What special move did they evolve?

Armadillo
Shell-Up Sprint
Sea Lion
Porpoise Missile

Armadillo

Shell-Up Sprint

First they jump straight up — a surprise pop.

Sea Lion

Porpoise Missile

They leap, twist, and snatch fish mid-zoom.

A secret move here is a real wild tool, not a video-game combo.

Whose special move would change the meeting?

YOUR SCORECARD

Your scorecard

Tap who has each fact. Then tap who you think wins.

  • SIZE & WEIGHT

  • TOOLS

  • SPEED

  • HOME

  • FOOD

  • MOOD

  • BRAINS

  • SPECIAL

Your card: Armadillo 0 · Sea Lion 0 · still open 8

Who wins the meeting?

Keep going for the pretend meeting, then the science pick.

WHAM!

THEY MEET

Armadillo runs first. Sea Lion does not race. They wait in the desert.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

WHOOSH!

THE TOOLS SHOW UP

Sea Lion is heavier. Armadillo uses digging claws. Nobody is keeping a gore score.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

ZING!

SPECIAL MOVES

Armadillo tries the Shell-Up Sprint. Sea Lion tries the Porpoise Missile. Keep your card. The last page is next.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

THE SCIENCE PICK

Sea Lion!

A STOMP

You skipped a final pick. The facts still stamp a champ.

On the desert, Sea Lion wins. Sea Lion is a lot heavier. Armadillo would still win some meetings at home.

In the wild, most animals skip a fight. We still judge who the bodies and the place would favor.

Science card: Armadillo 3 · Sea Lion 5.

Your card: Armadillo 0 · Sea Lion 0.

The last page follows the whole animal — body plus home — not one bar chart.

Send this fight

A friend can read the same facts.

Victory lap · Sea Lion

Harbor barking. The champ has notes.

Sarah Stierch · Wikimedia Commons · CC BY. Source

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