WHO WILL WIN?
Baboon
WAHOO-BARK
Anaconda
SLITHER-WHOMP
THE SETUP

Baboon vs Anaconda

Baboon
Baboon
Anaconda
Anaconda

Pretend a baboon and a anaconda meet in river country. Look at the facts. Then you pick.

Would they meet?

Almost never. Their homes sit next to each other.

This is pretend and based on facts. Real animals usually hide or leave.

Read the facts. Make your card. The page waits to pick.

Corner A

Baboon

Papio anubis · A troop-tough primate with serious canine teeth.

Baboon
Home
African savanna · Lives in Africa
Food
Plants and meat
Group
Hunts with a pack
Size
Baboon is small.

Omnivore troop.

Sharp eyes on the ground.

Bold, loud, and political.

  • Baboon is small and fast.
  • Fruit, grass, insects, and the occasional small animal.
  • Open country with cliffs for sleeping.

Family: Mandrills and geladas — the big-monkey cousin group.

Corner B

Anaconda

Eunectes murinus · A river rope that forgot it is allowed to be this heavy.

Anaconda
Home
Amazon rivers · Lives in South America
Food
Meat
Group
Lives alone
Size
Anaconda is big.

Wait in the water, coil, squeeze.

Heat pits plus a swimmer's patience.

Heavy and unhurried.

  • Anaconda is big and slow.
  • Capybara, fish, birds, caimans — if it comes to the water's edge, it is on the maybe list.
  • Slow rivers and swamps.

Family: Boas.

TO SCALE!

SIZE & WEIGHT

Stand them next to a grown-up. Who is bigger and heavier?

1.70 m

Grown-up

0.70 m

Baboon to scale

Baboon

0.40 m

Anaconda to scale

Anaconda

Height to scale. A grown-up is 1.7 m.

Baboon30 kg

About as heavy as a first-grader who lifts.

Anaconda200 kg

As heavy as a couple of grown-ups, longer than a classroom rug.

Baboon

0.70 m · 30 kg

Baboon is small. 30 kg.

Anaconda

0.40 m · 200 kg

Anaconda is big. 200 kg.

Kilograms are honest. A small animal can still have a strong tool.

Who would you pick for size?

TOOLKIT!

TOOLS

Teeth, claws, horns, venom, kick — what tools do they have?

  • Weapon: Dagger canines
  • Armor: Troop backup
  • Senses: Sharp eyes on the ground.

Baboon · labeled field diagram

  • Weapon: Coil squeeze
  • Armor: Water-slick muscle
  • Senses: Heat pits plus a swimmer's patience.

Anaconda · labeled field diagram

Baboon800 psi bite
Anaconda200 psi bite

Baboon

Dagger canines

Tool: dagger canines. Bite: 800 psi.

Anaconda

Coil squeeze

Tool: coil squeeze. Bite: 200 psi.

A bite number is only one tool. Coils and kicks count too.

Whose tools would you trust?

ZOOM!

SPEED

Who gets there first?

Baboon
45 km/h
Anaconda
8 km/h
Baboon45 km/h
Anaconda8 km/h

Baboon

45 km/h

Baboon can go 45 km/h. That is fast.

Anaconda

8 km/h

Anaconda can go 8 km/h. That is slow.

A fast animal can miss. A slow one only has to connect.

Who takes the speed card?

HOME MAP!

HOME

They meet in river country. Who is built for this place?

N. AmericaS. AmericaEuropeAfricaAsiaAustraliaAntarctica
BaboonAnacondaBoth

Meeting biome: river country. Colored land is where each animal actually lives.

Baboon

Can handle it · Lives in Africa

Baboon's home is the african savanna, not river country.

Anaconda

This is home · Lives in South America

Anaconda lives in places like river country.

Almost never. Their homes sit next to each other.

Who gets the home point?

MENU!

FOOD

How do they get lunch?

Baboon
Plants and meat · Omnivore troop.
Anaconda
Meat · Wait in the water, coil, squeeze.

Baboon

Plants and meat · Omnivore troop.

Fruit, grass, insects, and the occasional small animal.

Anaconda

Meat · Wait in the water, coil, squeeze.

Capybara, fish, birds, caimans — if it comes to the water's edge, it is on the maybe list.

A plant eater is not 'safe.' Hippos and elephants still end arguments.

Whose hunting or defending helps more?

MOOD!

MOOD

Alone vs team. This rumble is one vs one.

Baboon
Hunts with a pack
Anaconda
Lives alone
Baboon8 grit /10
Anaconda8 grit /10

Baboon

Hunts with a pack

Bold, loud, and political. Grit: 8/10.

Anaconda

Lives alone

Heavy and unhurried. Grit: 8/10.

Pack and pride animals lose their backup in a 1-v-1.

Who is better for a solo meeting?

PING!

BRAINS

Who notices first and thinks next?

Baboon
8/10
Anaconda
4/10
Baboon8 brains /10
Anaconda4 brains /10

Baboon

8/10

Sharp eyes on the ground.

Anaconda

4/10

Heat pits plus a swimmer's patience.

In the wild, brains often mean leave before it starts.

Who would you score for noticing?

COUSINS!

FAMILY

Who are they related to?

Baboon
Papio anubis
Anaconda
Eunectes murinus

Baboon

Papio anubis

Mandrills and geladas — the big-monkey cousin group.

Anaconda

Eunectes murinus

Boas.

Cousins are clues, not a score.

Not a fight point. Who has the wilder family story?

WILD CARD!

SPECIAL

What special move did they evolve?

Baboon
Alarm-Bark Charge
Anaconda
Swamp Wrap

Baboon

Alarm-Bark Charge

They spot leopards from a long way off, shout the news, and sometimes mob the threat.

Anaconda

Swamp Wrap

They wait like a log.

A secret move here is a real wild tool, not a video-game combo.

Whose special move would change the meeting?

YOUR SCORECARD

Your scorecard

Tap who has each fact. Then tap who you think wins.

  • SIZE & WEIGHT

  • TOOLS

  • SPEED

  • HOME

  • FOOD

  • MOOD

  • BRAINS

  • SPECIAL

Your card: Baboon 0 · Anaconda 0 · still open 8

Who wins the meeting?

Keep going for the pretend meeting, then the science pick.

THWACK!

THEY MEET

Baboon runs first. Anaconda does not race. They wait in river country.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

SLAM!

THE TOOLS SHOW UP

Anaconda is heavier. Baboon uses dagger canines. Nobody is keeping a gore score.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

POW!

SPECIAL MOVES

Baboon tries the Alarm-Bark Charge. Anaconda tries the Swamp Wrap. Keep your card. The last page is next.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

THE SCIENCE PICK

Anaconda!

A STOMP

You skipped a final pick. The facts still stamp a champ.

On river country, Anaconda wins. Anaconda likes river country more. Baboon would still win some meetings at home.

In the wild, most animals skip a fight. We still judge who the bodies and the place would favor.

Science card: Baboon 2 · Anaconda 5 · ties 1.

Your card: Baboon 0 · Anaconda 0.

The last page follows the whole animal — body plus home — not one bar chart.

Send this fight

A friend can read the same facts.

Also starring · Baboon

Yawn so big it counts as a roar.

Wikimedia Commons · CC. Source

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