WHO WILL WIN?
Giraffe
WHOMP
Chimpanzee
HOOT-PANT
THE SETUP

Giraffe vs Chimpanzee

Giraffe
Giraffe
Chimpanzee
Chimpanzee

Pretend a giraffe and a chimpanzee meet in forest. Look at the facts. Then you pick.

Would they meet?

Almost never. Their homes sit next to each other.

This is pretend and based on facts. Real animals usually hide or leave.

Read the facts. Make your card. The page waits to pick.

Corner A

Giraffe

Giraffa camelopardalis · A living watchtower with a killer kick.

Giraffe
Home
African savanna · Lives in Africa
Food
Plants
Group
Lives in a herd
Size
Giraffe is huge.

Browser, not hunter.

A living watchtower.

Shy until the legs come out.

  • Giraffe is huge and fast.
  • Giraffes nibble acacia leaves, tongues and all.
  • Their height is a lookout tower.

Family: Okapi — a forest cousin that looks like a giraffe-zebra remix.

Corner B

Chimpanzee

Pan troglodytes · The tool-using cousin with a wild side.

Chimpanzee
Home
African rainforest · Lives in Africa
Food
Plants and meat
Group
Hunts with a pack
Size
Chimpanzee is medium.

Team hunters of monkeys plus a lot of fruit.

Face-readers.

Curious and political.

  • Chimpanzee is medium and fast.
  • Fruit first, plus insects, leaves, and sometimes meat.
  • Forest canopy and the ground beneath it — a two-story house.

Family: Humans, bonobos, gorillas.

TO SCALE!

SIZE & WEIGHT

Stand them next to a grown-up. Who is bigger and heavier?

1.70 m

Grown-up

5.5 m

Giraffe to scale

Giraffe

1.20 m

Chimpanzee to scale

Chimpanzee

Height to scale. A grown-up is 1.7 m.

Giraffe1,200 kg

Tall enough to peek into a second-story window.

Chimpanzee50 kg

About as heavy as a fifth-grader who can do pull-ups forever.

Giraffe

5.5 m · 1,200 kg

Giraffe is huge. 1,200 kg.

Chimpanzee

1.20 m · 50 kg

Chimpanzee is medium. 50 kg.

Kilograms are honest. A small animal can still have a strong tool.

Who would you pick for size?

TOOLKIT!

TOOLS

Teeth, claws, horns, venom, kick — what tools do they have?

  • Weapon: Sledgehammer hooves
  • Armor: Ossicone helmet
  • Senses: A living watchtower.

Giraffe · labeled field diagram

  • Weapon: Team tactics + ape bite
  • Armor: Think-fast reflexes
  • Senses: Face-readers.

Chimpanzee · labeled field diagram

Giraffe20 psi bite
Chimpanzee1300 psi bite

Giraffe

Sledgehammer hooves

Tool: sledgehammer hooves. Bite: 20 psi.

Chimpanzee

Team tactics + ape bite

Tool: team tactics + ape bite. Bite: 1,300 psi.

A bite number is only one tool. Coils and kicks count too.

Whose tools would you trust?

ZOOM!

SPEED

Who gets there first?

Giraffe
50 km/h
Chimpanzee
40 km/h
Giraffe50 km/h
Chimpanzee40 km/h

Giraffe

50 km/h

Giraffe can go 50 km/h. That is fast.

Chimpanzee

40 km/h

Chimpanzee can go 40 km/h. That is fast.

A fast animal can miss. A slow one only has to connect.

Who takes the speed card?

HOME MAP!

HOME

They meet in forest. Who is built for this place?

N. AmericaS. AmericaEuropeAfricaAsiaAustraliaAntarctica
GiraffeChimpanzeeBoth

Meeting biome: forest. Colored land is where each animal actually lives.

Giraffe

Can handle it · Lives in Africa

Giraffe's home is the african savanna, not forest.

Chimpanzee

This is home · Lives in Africa

Chimpanzee lives in places like forest.

Almost never. Their homes sit next to each other.

Who gets the home point?

MENU!

FOOD

How do they get lunch?

Giraffe
Plants · Browser, not hunter.
Chimpanzee
Plants and meat · Team hunters of monkeys plus a lot of fruit.

Giraffe

Plants · Browser, not hunter.

Giraffes nibble acacia leaves, tongues and all.

Chimpanzee

Plants and meat · Team hunters of monkeys plus a lot of fruit.

Fruit first, plus insects, leaves, and sometimes meat.

A plant eater is not 'safe.' Hippos and elephants still end arguments.

Whose hunting or defending helps more?

MOOD!

MOOD

Alone vs team. This rumble is one vs one.

Giraffe
Lives in a herd
Chimpanzee
Hunts with a pack
Giraffe5 grit /10
Chimpanzee8 grit /10

Giraffe

Lives in a herd

Shy until the legs come out. Grit: 5/10.

Chimpanzee

Hunts with a pack

Curious and political. Grit: 8/10.

Pack and pride animals lose their backup in a 1-v-1.

Who is better for a solo meeting?

PING!

BRAINS

Who notices first and thinks next?

Giraffe
5/10
Chimpanzee
10/10
Giraffe5 brains /10
Chimpanzee10 brains /10

Giraffe

5/10

A living watchtower.

Chimpanzee

10/10

Face-readers.

In the wild, brains often mean leave before it starts.

Who would you score for noticing?

COUSINS!

FAMILY

Who are they related to?

Giraffe
Giraffa camelopardalis
Chimpanzee
Pan troglodytes

Giraffe

Giraffa camelopardalis

Okapi — a forest cousin that looks like a giraffe-zebra remix.

Chimpanzee

Pan troglodytes

Humans, bonobos, gorillas.

Cousins are clues, not a score.

Not a fight point. Who has the wilder family story?

WILD CARD!

SPECIAL

What special move did they evolve?

Giraffe
Sky-High Neck Sweep
Chimpanzee
Stick-and-Stone Strategy

Giraffe

Sky-High Neck Sweep

Necking looks silly until a 2-meter neck slams into you like a crane.

Chimpanzee

Stick-and-Stone Strategy

Wild chimps use tools: sticks for termites, stones for nuts, brains for everything else.

A secret move here is a real wild tool, not a video-game combo.

Whose special move would change the meeting?

YOUR SCORECARD

Your scorecard

Tap who has each fact. Then tap who you think wins.

  • SIZE & WEIGHT

  • TOOLS

  • SPEED

  • HOME

  • FOOD

  • MOOD

  • BRAINS

  • SPECIAL

Your card: Giraffe 0 · Chimpanzee 0 · still open 8

Who wins the meeting?

Keep going for the pretend meeting, then the science pick.

SKREEE!

THEY MEET

Giraffe runs first. Chimpanzee does not race. They wait in forest.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

CHOMP!

THE TOOLS SHOW UP

Giraffe is heavier. Chimpanzee uses team tactics + ape bite. Nobody is keeping a gore score.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

SNAP!

SPECIAL MOVES

Giraffe tries the Sky-High Neck Sweep. Chimpanzee tries the Stick-and-Stone Strategy. Keep your card. The last page is next.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

THE SCIENCE PICK

Giraffe!

A STOMP

You skipped a final pick. The facts still stamp a champ.

On forest, Giraffe wins. Giraffe is a lot heavier. Chimpanzee would still win some meetings at home.

In the wild, most animals skip a fight. We still judge who the bodies and the place would favor.

Science card: Giraffe 3 · Chimpanzee 3 · ties 2.

Your card: Giraffe 0 · Chimpanzee 0.

The last page follows the whole animal — body plus home — not one bar chart.

Send this fight

A friend can read the same facts.

Victory lap · Giraffe

Snack height: second-story. The meeting can wait.

Wikimedia Commons · Kruger National Park / CC. Source

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