WHO WILL WIN?
Gorilla
HOOT-HOOT-BAM
Tortoise
HISS-HMPH
THE SETUP

Gorilla vs Tortoise

Gorilla
Gorilla
Tortoise
Tortoise

Pretend a gorilla and a tortoise meet in the island. Look at the facts. Then you pick.

Would they meet?

Almost never. Their homes sit next to each other.

This is pretend and based on facts. Real animals usually hide or leave.

Read the facts. Make your card. The page waits to pick.

Corner A

Gorilla

Gorilla gorilla · A quiet giant until the chest-thump starts.

Gorilla
Home
African rainforest · Lives in Africa
Food
Plants
Group
Lives with family
Size
Gorilla is medium.

Forager.

Sharp eyes in the green.

Gentle until a family is threatened.

  • Gorilla is medium and fast.
  • Mostly leaves, stems, and fruit.
  • Dense forest is home.

Family: Chimpanzees, orangutans, and humans.

Corner B

Tortoise

Chelonoidis niger · A walking bunker that outlives arguments.

Tortoise
Home
Galápagos islands · Lives in South America
Food
Plants
Group
Lives alone
Size
Tortoise is big.

Browser.

They feel footsteps.

Unbothered fortress.

  • Tortoise is big and slow.
  • Cactus, grass, and island plants.
  • Dry islands where going slowly uses less water and fewer bad ideas.

Family: Turtles and terrapins.

TO SCALE!

SIZE & WEIGHT

Stand them next to a grown-up. Who is bigger and heavier?

1.70 m

Grown-up

1.70 m

Gorilla to scale

Gorilla

0.50 m

Tortoise to scale

Tortoise

Height to scale. A grown-up is 1.7 m.

Gorilla160 kg

As heavy as two kids in a backpack... if the backpack could bench-press a motorcycle.

Tortoise250 kg

As heavy as a grown-up, shaped like a helmet that learned to walk.

Gorilla

1.70 m · 160 kg

Gorilla is medium. 160 kg.

Tortoise

0.50 m · 250 kg

Tortoise is big. 250 kg.

Kilograms are honest. A small animal can still have a strong tool.

Who would you pick for size?

TOOLKIT!

TOOLS

Teeth, claws, horns, venom, kick — what tools do they have?

  • Weapon: Anvil fists + ape bite
  • Armor: Barrel chest
  • Senses: Sharp eyes in the green.

Gorilla · labeled field diagram

  • Weapon: Beak ram
  • Armor: Dome fortress
  • Senses: They feel footsteps.

Tortoise · labeled field diagram

Gorilla1300 psi bite
Tortoise200 psi bite

Gorilla

Anvil fists + ape bite

Tool: anvil fists + ape bite. Bite: 1,300 psi.

Tortoise

Beak ram

Tool: beak ram. Bite: 200 psi.

A bite number is only one tool. Coils and kicks count too.

Whose tools would you trust?

ZOOM!

SPEED

Who gets there first?

Gorilla
40 km/h
Tortoise
1 km/h
Gorilla40 km/h
Tortoise1 km/h

Gorilla

40 km/h

Gorilla can go 40 km/h. That is fast.

Tortoise

1 km/h

Tortoise can go 1 km/h. That is slow.

A fast animal can miss. A slow one only has to connect.

Who takes the speed card?

HOME MAP!

HOME

They meet in the island. Who is built for this place?

N. AmericaS. AmericaEuropeAfricaAsiaAustraliaAntarctica
GorillaTortoiseBoth

Meeting biome: the island. Colored land is where each animal actually lives.

Gorilla

Can handle it · Lives in Africa

Gorilla's home is the african rainforest, not the island.

Tortoise

This is home · Lives in South America

Tortoise lives in places like the island.

Almost never. Their homes sit next to each other.

Who gets the home point?

MENU!

FOOD

How do they get lunch?

Gorilla
Plants · Forager.
Tortoise
Plants · Browser.

Gorilla

Plants · Forager.

Mostly leaves, stems, and fruit.

Tortoise

Plants · Browser.

Cactus, grass, and island plants.

A plant eater is not 'safe.' Hippos and elephants still end arguments.

Whose hunting or defending helps more?

MOOD!

MOOD

Alone vs team. This rumble is one vs one.

Gorilla
Lives with family
Tortoise
Lives alone
Gorilla8 grit /10
Tortoise6 grit /10

Gorilla

Lives with family

Gentle until a family is threatened. Grit: 8/10.

Tortoise

Lives alone

Unbothered fortress. Grit: 6/10.

Pack and pride animals lose their backup in a 1-v-1.

Who is better for a solo meeting?

PING!

BRAINS

Who notices first and thinks next?

Gorilla
9/10
Tortoise
3/10
Gorilla9 brains /10
Tortoise3 brains /10

Gorilla

9/10

Sharp eyes in the green.

Tortoise

3/10

They feel footsteps.

In the wild, brains often mean leave before it starts.

Who would you score for noticing?

COUSINS!

FAMILY

Who are they related to?

Gorilla
Gorilla gorilla
Tortoise
Chelonoidis niger

Gorilla

Gorilla gorilla

Chimpanzees, orangutans, and humans.

Tortoise

Chelonoidis niger

Turtles and terrapins.

Cousins are clues, not a score.

Not a fight point. Who has the wilder family story?

WILD CARD!

SPECIAL

What special move did they evolve?

Gorilla
Chest-Drum Charge
Tortoise
Tuck and Outlast

Gorilla

Chest-Drum Charge

The chest beat is a warning.

Tortoise

Tuck and Outlast

They pull in.

A secret move here is a real wild tool, not a video-game combo.

Whose special move would change the meeting?

YOUR SCORECARD

Your scorecard

Tap who has each fact. Then tap who you think wins.

  • SIZE & WEIGHT

  • TOOLS

  • SPEED

  • HOME

  • FOOD

  • MOOD

  • BRAINS

  • SPECIAL

Your card: Gorilla 0 · Tortoise 0 · still open 8

Who wins the meeting?

Keep going for the pretend meeting, then the science pick.

WHAM!

THEY MEET

Gorilla runs first. Tortoise does not race. They wait in the island.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

WHOOSH!

THE TOOLS SHOW UP

Tortoise is heavier. Gorilla uses anvil fists + ape bite. Nobody is keeping a gore score.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

ZING!

SPECIAL MOVES

Gorilla tries the Chest-Drum Charge. Tortoise tries the Tuck and Outlast. Keep your card. The last page is next.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

THE SCIENCE PICK

Gorilla!

A CLEAR PICK

You skipped a final pick. The facts still stamp a champ.

On the island, Gorilla wins. Gorilla's anvil fists + ape bite helps more. Tortoise would still win some meetings at home.

In the wild, most animals skip a fight. We still judge who the bodies and the place would favor.

Science card: Gorilla 6 · Tortoise 2.

Your card: Gorilla 0 · Tortoise 0.

The last page follows the whole animal — body plus home — not one bar chart.

Send this fight

A friend can read the same facts.

Victory lap · Gorilla

Five seconds of gorilla. Blink and you miss the champ.

Raul654 · Wikimedia Commons · GFDL. Source

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