WHO WILL WIN?
Sloth
MEEP-SIGH
Elephant
BRAAAAAMP
THE SETUP

Sloth vs Elephant

Sloth
Sloth
Elephant
Elephant

Pretend a sloth and a elephant meet in forest. Look at the facts. Then you pick.

Would they meet?

Yes. They could meet in the real wild. This page is still a what-if.

This is pretend and based on facts. Real animals usually hide or leave.

Read the facts. Make your card. The page waits to pick.

Corner A

Sloth

Bradypus variegatus · The slowest fighter with the strongest grip.

Sloth
Home
Central and South American rainforest · Lives in South America
Food
Plants
Group
Lives alone
Size
Sloth is small.

Leaf eater in slow motion.

Not a hunter's kit.

Peaceful to a fault.

  • Sloth is small and slow.
  • Leaves.
  • The high canopy, where going nowhere slowly is a valid plan.

Family: Anteaters and armadillos — the xenarthran club of unhurried specialists.

Corner B

Elephant

Loxodonta africana · The walking earthquake.

Elephant
Home
African savanna and woodland · Lives in Africa
Food
Plants
Group
Lives with family
Size
Elephant is giant.

Does not hunt.

Hears thunder through its feet.

Usually calm.

  • Elephant is giant and fast.
  • Elephants munch 150 kg of plants a day.
  • They roam huge distances and remember watering holes for decades.

Family: Mammoths (extinct) and, surprisingly, manatees way back in the family tree.

TO SCALE!

SIZE & WEIGHT

Stand them next to a grown-up. Who is bigger and heavier?

1.70 m

Grown-up

0.60 m

Sloth to scale

Sloth

3.2 m

Elephant to scale

Elephant

Height to scale. A grown-up is 1.7 m.

Sloth6 kg

About as heavy as a small melon that refuses to rush.

Elephant6,000 kg

As heavy as a school bus. Yes, really.

Sloth

0.60 m · 6 kg

Sloth is small. 6 kg.

Elephant

3.2 m · 6,000 kg

Elephant is giant. 6,000 kg.

Kilograms are honest. A small animal can still have a strong tool.

Who would you pick for size?

TOOLKIT!

TOOLS

Teeth, claws, horns, venom, kick — what tools do they have?

  • Weapon: Three-toed hooks
  • Armor: Algae cloak
  • Senses: Not a hunter's kit.

Sloth · labeled field diagram

  • Weapon: Ivory battering rams
  • Armor: Tank-thick hide
  • Senses: Hears thunder through its feet.

Elephant · labeled field diagram

Sloth50 psi bite
Elephant800 psi bite

Sloth

Three-toed hooks

Tool: three-toed hooks. Bite: 50 psi.

Elephant

Ivory battering rams

Tool: ivory battering rams. Bite: 800 psi.

A bite number is only one tool. Coils and kicks count too.

Whose tools would you trust?

ZOOM!

SPEED

Who gets there first?

Sloth
2 km/h
Elephant
40 km/h
Sloth2 km/h
Elephant40 km/h

Sloth

2 km/h

Sloth can go 2 km/h. That is slow.

Elephant

40 km/h

Elephant can go 40 km/h. That is fast.

A fast animal can miss. A slow one only has to connect.

Who takes the speed card?

HOME MAP!

HOME

They meet in forest. Who is built for this place?

N. AmericaS. AmericaEuropeAfricaAsiaAustraliaAntarctica
SlothElephantBoth

Meeting biome: forest. Colored land is where each animal actually lives.

Sloth

This is home · Lives in South America

Sloth lives in places like forest.

Elephant

This is home · Lives in Africa

Elephant lives in places like forest.

Yes. They could meet in the real wild. This page is still a what-if.

Who gets the home point?

MENU!

FOOD

How do they get lunch?

Sloth
Plants · Leaf eater in slow motion.
Elephant
Plants · Does not hunt.

Sloth

Plants · Leaf eater in slow motion.

Leaves.

Elephant

Plants · Does not hunt.

Elephants munch 150 kg of plants a day.

A plant eater is not 'safe.' Hippos and elephants still end arguments.

Whose hunting or defending helps more?

MOOD!

MOOD

Alone vs team. This rumble is one vs one.

Sloth
Lives alone
Elephant
Lives with family
Sloth5 grit /10
Elephant7 grit /10

Sloth

Lives alone

Peaceful to a fault. Grit: 5/10.

Elephant

Lives with family

Usually calm. Grit: 7/10.

Pack and pride animals lose their backup in a 1-v-1.

Who is better for a solo meeting?

PING!

BRAINS

Who notices first and thinks next?

Sloth
3/10
Elephant
8/10
Sloth3 brains /10
Elephant8 brains /10

Sloth

3/10

Not a hunter's kit.

Elephant

8/10

Hears thunder through its feet.

In the wild, brains often mean leave before it starts.

Who would you score for noticing?

COUSINS!

FAMILY

Who are they related to?

Sloth
Bradypus variegatus
Elephant
Loxodonta africana

Sloth

Bradypus variegatus

Anteaters and armadillos — the xenarthran club of unhurried specialists.

Elephant

Loxodonta africana

Mammoths (extinct) and, surprisingly, manatees way back in the family tree.

Cousins are clues, not a score.

Not a fight point. Who has the wilder family story?

WILD CARD!

SPECIAL

What special move did they evolve?

Sloth
Hang In There
Elephant
Trunk Sling + Trumpet Blast

Sloth

Hang In There

Predators often cannot peel a sloth off a branch.

Elephant

Trunk Sling + Trumpet Blast

The trunk has about 40,000 muscles.

A secret move here is a real wild tool, not a video-game combo.

Whose special move would change the meeting?

YOUR SCORECARD

Your scorecard

Tap who has each fact. Then tap who you think wins.

  • SIZE & WEIGHT

  • TOOLS

  • SPEED

  • HOME

  • FOOD

  • MOOD

  • BRAINS

  • SPECIAL

Your card: Sloth 0 · Elephant 0 · still open 8

Who wins the meeting?

Keep going for the pretend meeting, then the science pick.

WHAM!

THEY MEET

Elephant runs first. Sloth does not race. They wait in forest.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

WHOOSH!

THE TOOLS SHOW UP

Elephant is heavier. Sloth uses three-toed hooks. Nobody is keeping a gore score.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

ZING!

SPECIAL MOVES

Sloth tries the Hang In There. Elephant tries the Trunk Sling + Trumpet Blast. Keep your card. The last page is next.

Pretend · fact-based · not a gore-fest

THE SCIENCE PICK

Elephant!

A STOMP

You skipped a final pick. The facts still stamp a champ.

On forest, Elephant wins. Elephant is a lot heavier. Sloth would still win some meetings at home.

In the wild, most animals skip a fight. We still judge who the bodies and the place would favor.

Science card: Sloth 0 · Elephant 7 · ties 1.

Your card: Sloth 0 · Elephant 0.

The last page follows the whole animal — body plus home — not one bar chart.

Send this fight

A friend can read the same facts.

Also starring · Sloth

The slowest victory lap on record.

Wikimedia Commons · CC. Source

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